Bad Ebay Pics

For those who have been to a Vanilla Pop show, you know I tend to wear shiny things-sequined jackets, metallic shirts, loud pants, mirrored thongs and ridiculous shoes. "Where do you get your clothes?" I am asked quite frequently. Naturally I get my garb on Ebay. The "Women's Clothing' section to be exact. Today I highlight a few gems from ladies who have no business holding a camera.

I've learned that the only place to find the good stuff...

is in the women's section. Men's clothing has little to no sparkle. Type in "Tiger shirt" and the men's section brings up Tiger Woods apparel. The last thing I need to do is to promote some misogynistic, millionaire asshole who takes long walks on grass for a living. Here are a few Ebay gems which I've collected over the years...

At first I thought these pants would be a good addition to my apparel arsenal...Gold and shiny with some red brocade accents. Delicious.

 Then the seller made the mistake of putting them on...

 

So much for the question "Does this make me look fat?"

She also gets a few more style points for the furniture.

Surrounding yourself with cheap Louis the XIV knockoffs

is no way to go through life. 

 Anyone want to join me in these pair of pants?

Oddly enough this is an auction for earrings.

Obviously the person who posted this photo has no sense of lighting, no idea how to focus and no taste in mannequins. 

At least she used a resolution of 10 pixels per foot.

Another example of "I don't give a shit" 
if this thing sells or not.

Let's hang this piece of crap in front of another piece of crap, un-center the hangar 

and hit the un-focus button.

This lady should be bidding on a tripod.
Or seeing a doctor about that Parkinson's.
Although maybe this blouse actually is fuzzy. 
Like Bigfoot. 

JFC.

 All I see when I look at this is a plastic tit.
 

This lady only had one picture of this jacket. This was it.

This person wouldn't have "photobombed" this picture if their arm wasn't the size of a telephone pole.

Below is another item for sale by the same seller.

I think their Ebay name is 

"Askmeificare".